Good grief, I hate Texas weather.
Most of the time, anyway.
1. It is possible that living in Texas is like living on the sun. Okay, that’s really far from the truth, but it is uncomfortably hot here sometimes.
2. If you see me with straight hair (or any sign that shows I have taken the time to actually style my hair) it means it’s raining, has rained or will rain within the next 20 minutes. Same goes for my desire to workout…if I willingly get up early in the morning because I decide I want to go for a jog, it is probably raining. At least I get to go back to sleep, right?
3. After 15 consecutive days of triple-digit temps, the weather man will for sure use the words COLD FRONT when talking about the day being in the 90’s. This is suppose to make us feel better. The sweat running down my back doesn’t believe him.
4. Walking up the stairs at UTSA in July feels like climbing Mt. Everest. Ditto for my apartment stairs. And don’t even get my started on hiking. Poor Jessica was ready to slap me because I kept asking her why we were climbing up a mountain.
5. Going shopping in September is one big cruel joke. All the cute, trendy fall clothes are just there to taunt us. Sure you can strut around in your new blazer and booties, but the minute you step outside you will look a fool. A sweaty fool. A sweaty blazer wearing fool! Word of advice: Buy the blazer and just stare at it longingly until the end of October, or maybe November just to be sure.
6. The only exception to the rule above: if you go to UTSA it is okay to wear a sweater because the buildings are basically Antartica. I’m still waiting to see where all the penguins are hiding.
7. You can always tell when a season has changed, not by the actual weather, but by the way people suddenly act and dress. The minute it hits 65 in September, it is officially fall and everybody will bust out their boots and scarves (and the aforementioned blazer, of course) and they’ll stand in like at Starbucks in desperate need of a pumpkin spice latte. When it hits 75 in March, all the girls will be in their denim cutoffs and gladiator sandals drinking with a cold beverage permanently stuck to their hand. Where are the boys you ask? They’ll just be staring.
8. When 75% of the Facebook statuses you see have the words, “float” “river” and “the” you know it’s summer.
9. In other parts of the country, cold weather lets people know the holiday season is around the corner. In Texas, it’s only when all the Halloween candy goes on clearance that I realize I need to start my Christmas shopping.
10. Contrary to popular belief, students in Texas do get snow days. Except they are called “ice days” or something like that. This is because when it does snow it rarely lasts all day. It’s more of a snow half-hour. Ah well, we’ll take what we can get.