Ran across the article below while perusing www.bobbybones.com today. For those who are wondering, Bobby Bones is the host of the morning radio show I listen to in Austin. I’m basically obsessed with this show. You should hear me on Tuesdays and Thursdays when I drive to SA for class, I literally scream and cry when I start to hear that fuzzy little noise that can only mean I’m losing them. Sad times indeed.
Another thing I’m slightly obsessed with? Lists. Of all sorts. To-do lists, ingredient lists, summer reading lists, etc. I mean, c’mon, this blog was originally centered around lists! I don’t know if it’s because I secretly am an organized person or because I’m so dumb my brain can’t handle sentences strung together in paragraph form. I’ll go with the former.
Moving on, I always read these types of articles and wonder if I’m suppose to fall into one of the predetermined categories they oh-so-nicely list for me. Just because I like, okay LOVE, lists doesn’t mean I’d like to be on one thankyouverymuch.
This article is about (insert dramatic pause here)…SINGLE WOMEN.
1. The Soul-Mate Seeker: Someone who is doing everything she can to find The One.
2. The Phoenix: A woman who recently had a painful breakup and is doing everything she can to rise from the ashes in better shape.
3. The Organic: She prefers to leave things up to destiny and live her own life rather than hunting for men in any methodical or calculated way.
4. The Princess-in-Waiting: She is waiting to be rescued by a prince (who sure is taking his royal time).
5. The Late Bloomer: The rest of her life is on hold while she waits for her future husband to appear.
6. The Free Spirit: She worries that she can only have one or the other — her independence or a committed relationship. (And she thinks the former is better.)
7. The Wedding Wisher: She suddenly finds herself fantasizing about marriage after a lifetime of not caring about it.
8. The Town Rebel: She no longer aspires to live the cookie-cutter lifestyle of everyone else in her community, though she once used to.
9. The Ritual Re-inventor: A woman who wants to get hitched but also feels very strongly about having an unconventional marriage (right down to the wedding ceremony).
10. The Someday-Mom: She would like to have babies someday, but wishes she didn’t feel so much biological pressure to figure it out fast.
11. The Slow & Steady: A woman who hopes to marry when the time is right. Meanwhile, she does her best not to cave to the massive pressure she feels from friends, family, and society.
12. The Trailblazer: A woman who knows married life is not for her, so she’s trying to break a new kind of path to happiness.
End Article. Begin Mansee rant.
Um, really? I’m suppose to tell you that I’m just one of those women? Here’s the real deal:
To the public I (like to think I) am:
The Organic, The Town Rebel, The Someday Mom and The Slow&Steady.
On the days that I hate the male species I am:
The Phoenix, The Ritual Re-Inventor and The Free Spirit.
If I lived in never, ever land with fairies and talking birds I would be:
The Princess-in-Waiting and The Late Bloomer.
If I find myself at age 50 sharing a one bedroom apartment with 8 dogs I will most certainly be:
The Someday Mom, The Trailblazer (just to make myself feel better, of course), The Wedding Wisher and The Soulmate Seeker.
Damn, I’m out of options. Maybe this is why they haven’t put a ring on it?
What about you? Can you relate to one of the above? Also, does the centered text weird you out? (If it does, I might consider changing it)