Has anyone noticed that the process of finding a job is eerily similar to that of finding a date?
Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
Let’s do a little comparison action, shall we?
Career: You (read: I) know what you (I) want. An entry-level position with a public relations/advertising agency. I’ve interned with agencies before so I know I’m a good fit and I thouroughly enjoyed all the work I did with them.
Date: You (okay fine, I) am 100 percent sure I want a tall man. My collection of heels just won’t have it any other way. Okay, I’m kidding (sort of). But, like most people, I have that “list” of traits that I know I want in a date/boyfriend. Please don’t act like you’ve never made a list of traits you want in others. Seriously, get off your high horse. You’ve done it. We all have. It’s human.
Career: When I find a job opening that sounds perfect for me, I obsessively work on my resume to make sure it will stand out from the sea of resumes they receive daily. I may not be a Harvard grad, but I was editor-in-chief of my university newspaper for three semesters, held a full-time job for a lot of my time in college and interned with two PR agencies. Impressive, no?
Date: When I meet a guy who seems like a good fit for me, I (sadly) obsessively analyze everything I do/say to make sure I stand out from the sea of girls that I am SO sure are my competition. I may not be a Victoria’s Secret model, but I’m nice, funny and can bake a mean batch of cookies. Impressive, no?
Career: I check my e-mail a million times a day. Nothing.
Date: Voicemail, text messages, Tweets, Facebook comments. All nothing.
Career: I try not to think about it. Someday some company will look at me and think “Hey, she’s perfect for us! Hired!” Until then, I can enjoy my post-grad life and do things I probably couldn’t do if I had a full-time job.
Date: I’m pretty sure someday some guy will look at me and thing “Eh, she’s cool. Date!” Until then, I can enjoy all the things I like to do by myself. Like eat an entire bag of gummy bears while forcing my dog to hang out with me.
Career: How soon can I follow-up after sending in my resume?
Date: How many texts is too many?
Career: When I least expect it (read: forgot that I even applied to the job) I hear back. Then I get overly excited and think I’m going to have a panic attack.
Date: When I least expect it (read: when I’ve decided that being the single old lady with 18 dogs won’t be so bad) I hear from man of the moment. Then I get overly excited and think I’m going to have a panic attack.
Career: First interview. Must look professional.
Date: First date. Must look cute.
Career: How much should I talk about myself? Do they need to know about my love for Justin Bieber? (Answer: No)
Date: How much should I talk about myself? Do they need to know about my love for Justin Bieber? (Answer: Not yet)
See what I mean? Exactly the same!
Anybody else facing the same problems as me? Any tips? Need a shoulder to cry on?
P.S. Some details exaggerated for humors sake. For example, I don’t really suffer from panic attacks when men text me. I do, however, eat a lot of gummy bears.
P. P.S. Really, nobody wants to join my virtual book club? Laaaame.